Agency
Tuesday, February 23rd, 2010The Universe keeps bringing Agency to my attention the last few days, so I guess there is something I need to pay attention to and learn from!
Last night, Chris gave our family a lesson for our Family Home Evening on Agency and choices. And on Sunday, one of the lessons that was taught in church was about Agency! The teacher asked the attendees to give examples of how we have made a choice and then noticed the consequences of those choices (she only wanted good examples). I immediately thought of a choice that I made with Nicholas being born, but I felt stupid sharing it in the class. But I will share it here. When I was 7 months along with my oldest child, I was 21 years old, we were told that he had a hole in his heart which would need open-heart surgery, plus he had a “coarctation” (a narrowing of an arch in his heart, which would need to be fixed a few days after his birth), and on top of that there is a 50% chance that he could have Down syndrome which will bring a whole slew of problems on its’ own. Our world was shattered – or so we thought. We decided to have an amniocentesis just to be sure so that we were prepared at his birth. We met with the Geneticist and we were told that he does have Down syndrome and that abortion is an option if we choose it. I have never believed in abortion, and although at the time I felt like my life was basically over and would be miserable from then on, it was a very easy decision to keep him. As I look back on the last 13-1/2 years since Nicholas’ birth, I am so amazed that even though it has been a hard road with him I have learned so much and wouldn’t trade him for anything! He has brought things into my life that I never could have learned or experienced otherwise. I know that Chris feels the same way. So my point is that not all of our choices that we make in life are going to be easy or fun, but if they are right then the pay-offs will be well-worth it and amazing!
Today this was on Carol Tuttle’s Remembering Wholeness Facebook Group Page: “In every moment, during every day of your life, you have choices. The choice to create more struggle or the choice to create more freedom and joy.” “Choose thoughts that support you in feeling good more and more each day.”
And to end, this story was forwarded to me through email this morning. I love it…
John is the kind of guy you love to hate. He is always in a good mood and always has something positive to say. When someone would ask him how he was doing, he would reply, ‘If I were any better, I would be twins!’ He was a natural motivator. If an employee was having a bad day, John was there telling the employee how to look on the positive side of the situation. Seeing this style really made me curious, so one day I went up and asked him, ‘I don’t get it! You can’t be a positive person all of the time. How do you do it?’
He replied, ‘Each morning I wake up and say to myself, you have two choices today. You can choose to be in a good mood or…you can choose to be in a bad mood. I choose to be in a good mood. Each time something bad happens, I can choose to be a victim or…I can choose to learn from it. I choose to learn from it. Every time someone comes to me complaining, I can choose to accept their complaining or…I can point out the positive side of life. I choose the positive side of life.’
‘Yeah, right, it’s not that easy,’ I protested.
‘Yes, it is,’ he said. ‘Life is all about choices. When you cut away all the junk, every situation is a choice. You choose how you react to situations. You choose how people affect your mood. You choose to be in a good mood or bad mood. The bottom line: It’s your choice how you live your life.’
I reflected on what he said. Soon hereafter, I left the Tower Industry to start my own business.. We lost touch, but I often thought about him when I made a choice about life instead of reacting to it.
Several years later, I heard that he was involved in a serious accident, falling some 60 feet from a communications tower. After 18 hours of surgery and weeks of intensive care, he was released from the hospital with rods placed in his back. I saw him about six months after the accident. When I asked him how he was, he replied, ‘If I were any better, I’d be twins…Wanna see my scars?’ I declined to see his wounds, but I did ask him what had gone through his mind as the accident took place. ‘The first thing that went through my mind was the well-being of my soon-to-be born daughter,’ he replied. ‘Then, as I lay on the ground, I remembered that I had two choices: I could choose to live or…I could choose to die. I chose to live.’
‘Weren’t you scared? Did you lose consciousness?’ I asked..
He continued, ‘….the paramedics were great. They kept telling me I was going to be fine. But when they wheeled me into the ER and I saw the expressions on the faces of the doctors and nurses, I got really scared. In their eyes, I read ‘he’s a dead man’. I knew I needed to take action.’
‘What did you do?’ I asked.
‘Well, there was a big burly nurse shouting questions at me,’ said John. ‘She asked if I was allergic to anything ‘Yes, I replied.’ The doctors and nurses stopped working as they waited for my reply. I took a deep breath and yelled, ‘Gravity’ Over their laughter, I told them, ‘I am choosing to live. Operate on me as if I am alive, not dead.’”
He lived, thanks to the skill of his doctors, but also because of his amazing attitude….I learned from him that every day we have the choice to live fully. Attitude, after all, is everything. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.’
After all today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.
