I hope that by sharing my honest experiences as I heal, that others will find help and hope. Start at the About My Quest tab.

I received a neat Comment from Pamala Oslie on my New Years’ Eve post!  Thanks Pam, it means so much to me that you would take the time to do that!

I have had many situations lately that have seemed “in my face” regarding an issue I have with relationships and I am unsure of how to clear it.  I am doing the things that I know how, but this issue keeps coming up.  I need some advice on this!  I took myself to my room and said a heartfelt prayer that I will know how to clear this issue that I am so frustrated about lately.  I started tapping on some basics, and I feel like I was given some things in my mind to say and write down.  I feel a little better.  So I will look daily at those positive affirmations that I just wrote down, and see if anything else comes up about this issue.  I am feeling really badly about myself, but trying not to.  I’m tired of creating the same negative issue that I have since I was a child.

So this has been a hard day for me, but I feel like some of these hard issues are being worked out and I’m feeling more encouraged tonight.  Here’s to an awesome day tomorrow!!!!

I can’t believe it’s been a whole year!!!!!!  I’ve been looking forward to this day all year, and early-on honestly wondered if it would come.  One year ago I was suicidal and in absolute despair with zero hope, Clinical Depression that I had for 24 years, Anxiety Disorder, ADD, OCD, with numerous physical problems.  I had no vision for my future.  I hated myself and hated everything.  Things that I was learning about wouldn’t stick in my brain and I kept creating the same depression, negative issues and negative experiences.  But for some reason I got enough guts to call Pamala Oslie’s radio show on New Years’ Eve and that was the beginning of My Quest for Healing!  I copied the post that I wrote on that day below in italics.  I am teary thinking about how far I have come, the hope I have gained, all of the knowledge that I have been led to and been able to internalize.  I really never thought that I would be alive, happy, and thriving, and it didn’t take very long once I was able to really get started!  And I have not had Clinical Depression or Anxiety Disorder for 9+ months now.  I still have my down times, but I am able to get out of it instead of staying there like I used to.  I am SO excited for my future, to see what this new year will bring, to know that I can create happiness and wonderful experiences no matter what, and that I can just keep improving!  I still am just amazed that I could come this far.  I wish this for everybody, and still hope that by my sharing the things I am learning that others will be helped and find peace and happiness!

Here is my post from 1 year ago.  What a difference in my posts!  “Today was another rough one for me. I am SO low, I’m really just giving up. I feel horrible about everything and everybody. Who wants to live in such darkness? We have a family party to go to tonight but I don’t think I’m going to go. I’d rather be alone. Chris and the kids will just go.  I called Pamala Oslie tonight just to see what my Life Colors are. I got much more than that. The call is archived here: http://www.netbriefings.com/event/auracolors/Archives/radioshow/index.html I am the second caller on December 31, 2008 on the show entitled “Which Universe are You Living In?” I was trying so hard not to cry and reveal to her my insides. She saw them anyway. I think it is very ironic that New Years’ Eve was really the beginning of the end of my quest. I really feel that this is the kick in the pants that I’ve needed!  Pamala said that it is very important for me to get a Vision Board, breathing is huge for me, and to write down my feelings and hopes and dreams (that was the pre-vision for this Blog). Off the air during the commercial break, Kat (the host of the radio show) and Pamala gave me some good advice. They said that I am focusing so much on what is negative about me and not focusing on what I WANT, that it’s just keeping me down. The Law of Attraction. I’m attracting more negative to me. They suggested that I read Happy for No Reason by Marci Shimoff (I had remembered her from when I was listening to The Secret a lot a year or two ago). I decided tonight that I was going to go on a quest to find myself, happiness, peace, and health. And I won’t stop until I do.  After the call, I felt so much better that I wanted to go to the party. So I’ll have to start on the things she told me to do tomorrow – January first. What a way to start off the new year, huh?! But I think tonight might be my turnaround point! And thank you Heavenly Father for guiding me to her and the knowledge she shared with me!”

Something very interesting just happened.  Right after I finished writing the above post I looked on Facebook and noticed that someone sent me an “Ugly Duckling Gift”.  Which was a little funny, and yet not.  And I allowed myself to feel bad.  So it’s funny because it was a very “in your face” way to let me know I still have issues!  I still feel that way a little about myself, and so am creating others feeling that way about me.  So, off do to some EFT on this issue!! (and get myself feeling good again)

So I’ve been tapping and thinking alot about why someone would send me an insult like that.  I realized that it’s not just about me feeling ugly.  There’s much more to it than that.  So, I am very grateful for someone showing up right now to let me see what some more of my issues are so that I can get rid of them.  Thanks, Friend!

I did some EFT on my husband last night, probably the 2nd or 3rd time I’ve done that for him, and he said that it helped with the issue.  And we’re going to do more, yeah!

I have been reading a book that my sister loaned me about taking the Savior’s hand.  It is incredible, and I know will help me so much on this quest!  It is called “When You can’t Do it Alone” by Brent L. Top, an LDS author.  I know that learning all I can within my spiritual and religious beliefs, along with all of the other self-help methods that I have already been exploring, is what is going to be best for my healing.

I’ve been a little frustrated lately about my life.  I can literally see in my mind what I want my life to be like, but I’m not there yet and I want to be!  I guess I just need to be patient, and wait for the things to come.  But that is really hard for me.  I want things NOW!  And I get discouraged thinking, what if I’m not on the right track? what if the lows and the negative thoughts that I still have sometimes are pushing away the good things that are coming?  how long will it take for these things to manifest? why isn’t the money showing up yet so that I can DO all of these things? I know, patience is a virtue.  That’s not ever been my strong point, but then, that’s something else to add to my long list of things to change about me!  I also just remembered that it took Carol Tuttle 15 years to make the changes she wanted.  And with the knowledge that I have that she didn’t have, it still might take me a while, but it definitely won’t be that long.

I started getting a little anxiety about the paragraph above.  So I just did some EFT on that, and in the middle of it I realized that I am holding on too tightly.  A few days ago I heard (from The Secret or Pamala Oslie’s radio show maybe?) something about if you get too emotionally involved with an issue that it actually pushes it away.  I am definitely feeling too emotionally tied to my visions/dreams today and them not manifesting yet, so I tapped on that.  I now need to trust that things are coming to me and since I have asked God for help He will help me.  It also came into mind the saying, “Let go and let God.” I need to remember this.  I know this is true, I have seen it several times in my life and others’.

I’ve been listening more to Pamala Oslie’s archived radio shows and Carol Tuttle’s cd’s, while I’ve been getting ready this morning, doing other things, and in the car. And I’m finishing up Bob Doyle’s teleseminar. He talks a lot about getting rid of our “resistance” to things, and working every day, as many times a day as you need to to get rid of any resistance to having the things we want, being happy, getting angry about things, someone always treating you poorly, or whatever. He suggests getting rid of them by doing EFT, but there’s also other methods out there (RET or Rapid Eye Technology, for example). 6 steps to getting the Law of Attraction to work: 1-Right before getting out of bed, get your vision for your day or your life and how exactly you want things to be, 2-Surround yourself with your desire, make lists or cut out pictures, etc. of what you want exactly, 3-Mind your feelings and get rid of resistance , 4-Take inspired action, 5-Watch it happening, 6-Feel genuine gratitude for everything you can think of

I went to the dentist this morning to get some fillings, and I wasn’t nervous! A few times I’ve gotten so nervous I’ve gotten nauseous or just been so tense that I’m pooped after. Today, occasionally I’d get just a little twinge of anxiety, but then I’d immediately catch the irrational fear and think of good and positive things while they were working on me. And I thought a lot, “I am so grateful for dentists! What a blessing they are to us!” and I really meant it and felt the feelings. It was so much nicer and more bearable being in the dentist chair. Now maybe that I’m getting healed, I won’t have cavities every year!

We went on a walk at 9:30 tonight for a half hour, and actually, I didn’t want to stop it felt so great! That’s absolutely amazing, I always hated to walk.

Another harder morning. Definitely not as hard as my “old self”, but not that easy, either. I took offense at something too which is making it even harder for me to be positive and happy. I said some forgivenesses which helped a little, now I need to focus on getting myself happy for a few minutes.

I said my prayers and I felt better, then I did my energy exercises (from The Promise of Energy Psychology by David Feinstein, Donna Eden, and Gary Craig) while breathing fairly deeply and looking at my Vision Board Wall (I do the homolateral exercises since my energies are switched still. I know they’re switched because I have someone push on my arm while I put my other hand on my head. But I can’t remember now how exactly to tell, and I can’t remember which book it says it in.)

In the mail the other day was a March of Dimes and a Leukemia Lymphoma donation envelope. I never pay to those since I’ve always been in debt and didn’t feel like I could give to those causes, plus I give a 10% tithing to my church already. But I’ve been reading about giving. When we don’t give because we think we don’t have enough money then we’re putting ourselves in the “lack” mode and that we need to help others and give money, even more so than we would normally. So, I did. Instead of throwing the envelopes away, I put $2 in each and sent them off and had feelings of gratitude that we do have money and I can help others. It felt really good! I know $2 isn’t much, but for me it is and I think that’s what matters.

Knowing now what my children’s aura colors (and thus their real personalities) are is helping me to understand them better and be more accepting of them. Pamala Oslie is so awesome!

While I worked on my website, I listened to Carol Tuttle’s “Affirmations to Change Your Life Now”. She says that “I am” are the two most powerful words which to create. She explains when Christ says, “I am that I am” it means He is the Creator. Interesting, I had always wondered what that meant!!

It’s so interesting to me (and a little frustrating, but I’m trying to be positive) that sometimes certain methods of healing will work for me, and other times they don’t. For instance, some days looking at my Vision Board and Mind Movie will really give me a happiness and joyful feeling, but today, I’m having to go deeper than that. Just those simple things aren’t really working for me. I just lay on the bed and meditated for a few minutes and breathed deeply (breathing always helps) and I thought of doing some EFT. I have NO idea why I’m kindof down and grumpy today, so I just tapped on, “I’m feeing down and negative for some reason today”. After doing that for a few minutes, I definitely feel better. Still not what I’ve felt before, but better. So I need to not be discouraged that what I usually do doesn’t work, I just need to keep doing the many things that I’m learning about and I’ll get there.

This just came in an email to me today: “’For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. Be not thou therefore ashamed of the testimony of our Lord.’ (2 Timothy 1:7–8.)” God does not want us to fear, and He has given us power and a sound mind and love. So the negative stuff obviously comes from the adversary because it doesn’t come from God!

I’ve been thinking about my knees and it keeps popping into my mind about what it says in James 2:17 “Faith, if it hath not works, is dead.” I take that to mean that we can’t just have faith and do nothing to help things along. We can’t expect Heavenly Father to do EVERYTHING for us. For instance, we’re told that we need to exercise to be healthy. Well, if I don’t like exercising, does God accept that and say, “Ok, since you don’t like to do it, I’ll just strengthen your body for you.” Nope. He doesn’t work that way. So, since I’ve prayed for healing, maybe Heavenly Father expects me to do “works” as well. I did EFT, but I think maybe He wants me to strengthen my knees on my own. Especially since I haven’t had regular exercise in probably 10 years, my knees are weak. So I need to do my part to strengthen them. Yuck. But I want healing, so I’ll do the dreaded walking every day and specific knee-strengthening exercises so that I can eventually dance and do other fun exercising. I’ve done knee strengthening exercises in the past, and while it definitely strengthened my leg muscles, it didn’t help my knee problems. But, now that I am focusing on using The Law of Attraction in a positive way, maybe this time it will work!

This was very timely, but an email just came from The Science of Getting Rich about Actions. It talked about how we shouldn’t just work hard for something, but think about what you want first, and really believe you can have it, then act (and it should be Inspired Action, like it says in The Secret)

Ok, I just went on a walk. I almost didn’t go, but I just stopped thinking about it and got ready and out the door. I said affirmations to myself the whole way (only about 15 minutes, but it’s a start!) and really tried to breathe deeply and lots. Now that I’m home, I still feel like I want to focus on breathing and do it deeply. It feels really good. I still want to research more into it, but I looked up breathe and Breath of Life in the scriptures, and I found in Genesis 2:7 “And the Lord God…breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living soul.” I find that very interesting. By God’s breath, man came alive? Yes, breathing sustains our life and if we go for more than a few minutes without it we die, but why? Why can we go without food and water for days longer, but not without air? Then in Genesis 7:22 it’s talking about during the flood of Noah, and how when the flood came everything died, “All in whose nostrils was the breath of life, of all that was in the dry land, died.” I want to research this more later.

Adam is in his room screaming at me. He’s been sad, angry, non-compliant, argumentative, and not listening all week. If I am getting better, why is he getting worse? It’s been nice, though, that I haven’t been mean back to him. I’ve stayed calm, most of the time. I did raise my voice once to him, but I am trying to be proud of myself that I did so well! And I FEEL better about myself when I do positive things, which makes me in a better mood!

Wow this has been a roller coaster of a day with my moods. I can’t seem to stay positive. This evening was very rotten, I got mad at Adam and was just totally frustrated with him and the other boys. I always feel so bad when the boys go to bed with me mad. After they got in bed, I’ve been sitting here in the quiet, reading my scriptures, then doing some EFT on Adam and me. I think I know what his problem is this week, that I’ve hardly paid any attention to him, other than telling him “no” or just micro-managing things he should be doing. I’m sure that he hasn’t been listening to me, yelling at me, saying I’m being mean, etc. because he’s starving for my attention, poor little boy. Tomorrow I will do better. Hopefully that is the answer. In the meantime, I’m trying to forgive myself and be positive. I need to go to bed early.

I’m not feeling as good this morning as I was yesterday – but it’s ok, I am doing my best to remember to think positively and be happy. I’m again listening to Carol Tuttle’s cd “Clear Your Debt, Create Harmony & Prosperity with Money” as I do some other things around the house.

I went over to Michelle’s (sister) house to have her do some EFT on me for my knees. I’ve had knee problems since I was about 8 years old and doctors say nothing is wrong with them. I haven’t been able to exercise or do fun things because of my knees (and my back). I can always tell when I’ve released some issues that are huge because I cry. So we definitely released some of those. Since I’ve lived with that issue for so long, I need to think positive thoughts about my knees being healed like Carol Tuttle says, “It is my experience to have healthy and strong knees. It is familiar to me to have healthy and strong knees.”

Michelle and I were talking about my call with Pamala Oslie yesterday and how great it feels to know who I came to this earth as, and the things I need to work on to be myself. I was telling her about the inspiration to do the website, and she was really excited for me. I told her about how great I feel lately, and how I actually LOVE life now and am so excited to see what my life brings in the future!! She was shocked, “What?! That doesn’t sound like you AT ALL!” She just couldn’t believe the difference in my attitude. Instead of wanting to die, I am excited to live! It feels SO awesome! She was also wondering how I was doing without Chris here this week. I told her that I feel bad but it’s almost like I don’t even miss him. I’m doing just great without him. She reminded me that I don’t know what that feels like to have a healthy relationship with him and not needy, and so it seems like I don’t miss him because I actually don’t need him for me to survive. She suggested that I let him know that, and how grateful I am to him for these 13+ years carrying me along, loving me through all of the awfulness, and taking on so much responsibility, but that I don’t need him like I did. She thinks that will be huge for him and he can start being himself again. So it will be fun to see Chris change as I change!

I did Adam’s reading lesson today. (Teach Your Child to Read in 100 Easy Lessons, I taught Matthew to read with this book when he was 5 years old, it gives you everything to say and do, it is so awesome. I am NOT a teacher, or at least wasn’t, and had no patience. But it’s so great!) When he was having a challenge remembering what sound “i” makes, I told him, “Say, ‘I remember that i says i’ ‘It’s so easy for me to remember that I says ‘i’.” He said those things, and a few minutes later I heard him repeating to himself the sound that i makes. So instead of me getting mad and frustrated at him, I calmly reminded him to make positive statements about this, and he’s remembering it!

I just picked up Matthew’s carpool, and I actually talked to the kids (I usually am quiet the whole time because I’m bugged by them) and told them I would bring them a treat tomorrow, just because I felt like it! I’m amazed how good I feel!!

The boys were dawdling getting ready for bed, and I slipped a little bit into my old self. I was in the “hurry, time is running out” mode, and getting upset at them for being silly and not getting done quickly. They’re in bed now, and I am sitting down, listening to Carol Tuttle, writing this, breathing deeply and trying to feel positive again.

Every day I read or search for things in the scriptures, even if it’s just for a few minutes. Tonight I looked up Truth and found in St. John 3:21 “He that doeth truth cometh to the light.” and 8:32 “know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.” Aren’t they just so true? It is so freeing to know truth and live by it!

It has been a nice morning so far – I’ve really tried to stay smiling and positive and speaking kindly while getting the boys ready for school. It’s nice to start the day off well!

I had a ½ hour phone session with Pamala Oslie this morning – she is so incredible! What a kind and helpful person she is, and what a gift she has! She is definitely one of my heroes. The things she told me completely coincided with the things that my Patriarchal Blessing (in my church, these are blessings told to us about our life to give us more direction) tells me. Now after the session, I feel so awesome! I am SO excited to live and to see what comes about in my life! (That is completely the opposite feeling than what I’ve had for most of my life. What a difference!) And now that she told me my family’s Life Colors, I can easier help my children be who they are.

I just had a great conversation with my son Matthew (10). His brother Adam (5) has been SO excited all day for him to come home and see his Lego Starwars game that he’s been playing. Matthew got home, and realized that somehow Adam had wiped out Matthew’s game which was hard for him to get to the higher levels. Both my boys came upstairs bawling – Matthew because his game was wiped out, Adam because Matthew was mad at him. So I explained to Matthew some of the things that I’ve been learning about. We can’t change the past. We can only learn from mistakes. It was an accident that Adam wiped his game out, and there’s nothing we can do now to change it. We can choose to be upset about the past and hurt people because we’re hurting, or choose to let it roll off us and move on and be happy. I told him to breathe deeply and focus on right now. I said that it is completely up to us what we make of this life. Do we make things hard, or easy? We don’t have to make them hard – that is up to us. If something SEEMS hard, are we going to let it BE hard, or make it BE easy? It’s up to us to choose and act accordingly. He understood the things I said to him, and felt like they were true. It’s so great that I can pass this knowledge that I am gaining onto my children, and help their lives to be better! I wish I had learned these lessons many years ago. But I know it now, and I’m not turning back. Life is SO much nicer already! I know it going to be so awesome when I’ve let these new truths stick!

Carol Tuttle in Remembering Wholeness said that when she was trying to change:

“I would walk around the house repeating between fifty to one hundred times a day, ‘I am happy, life is easy, and it is familiar.’ I would notice and catch myself making life harder than it had to be and say to myself, Some part of me is still believing I am a victim and that life has to be hard. Then I would ask myself, What do I want? I want to feel good, I want to be happy, and I want others to feel good just being around me. Then I would translate that into self-affirmations and say to myself, I am feeling good. I am happy. I am experiencing others feeling good just from being in my presence. Whatever you are currently dealing with, know that it no longer has to be hard or take a long time to change. Your intention to feel good right now will be honored, and your life will start to change. Keep coming back to that and think good thoughts as many times as you need to. It will become your reality.”

I love this. I am going to print it out and add it to the things I look at every day.

I picked Matthew up (and hugged him) as he wrapped his legs around me and he said, “Your legs are getting stronger!” I wasn’t sure what he meant. So he said, “You didn’t used to be able to pick me up without it hurting your legs.” I was excited! But then I walked up the stairs a few minutes later and I strained my knee. I need to be healed to be able to exercise, dance, have fun, etc. But how? What do I need to do to be healed? I just looked up “healing” in the scriptures, and found about the man who wanted to be healed but didn’t believe, so he prayed for faith (“heal thou my unbelief”) and then he was healed. So, is it as easy as just having the faith that Heavenly Father, through Christ, can heal me? If so, I must not have enough faith. I even prayed for it, and I guess I still don’t have it. I don’t understand.

I’ve realized that I have been struggling so much with my life since getting married because I am so independent and want to be doing “bigger things” and haven’t done those in addition.  I’ve been focusing too much on the Blue (from Pamala Oslie’s Life Colors) in me, (being a mom, wife, etc.) but I’ve neglected my Violet.  Although, I haven’t been a good Blue – I’ve not even been providing the things my family needs because I think I’m resisting it.  I have always LOVED being in the mountains, particularly Big Cottonwood Canyon for some reason, and I would love to have a cabin up there.  I’ve loved to go 4-wheeling, especially in huge mud puddles, camp, travel, go to Disney parks, dance – these things are just ME, and I need to do them.  Sometimes when I think of them, it physically hurts that I’m not doing them.  But I’ve completely cut them out of my life.  I think when I became a mom, for some reason I just quit being myself.

My children are so awesome and I love them SO much, yet I have never felt that I am “mom material”.  I hated being a child, which is probably why I’ve never done well around children.  I don’t like to play with my kids, and do all of the fun, creative stuff like so many other moms do – I guess the “typical” mom.  And I have wondered all of the time, “What is wrong with me?  I am supposed to be the “typical” mom and I’m not.  Why?”  But who is to say that that kind of mom is correct and all other types of moms are wrong?  Why do I feel that I have to be like everyone else, and that if I’m not that I’m bad or wrong or not taking care of my kids well enough?  I’m not like everyone else, and I really don’t believe that Heavenly Father expects all people to be the same.  But the way that I’ve been trying to be a mom and wife, I feel completely trapped.  I am trying too hard to be someone else, and have forgotten who I am and who I need to be.  So before I got married, I was never home.  Now that I’m married and have kids it is completely the opposite.  I shy away from social situations, want to hole up in my house (I hate even just going on basic errands to keep my house running).  I have become a complete hermit.  Why?  And what can I do to get out of that?

So what can I do to get the balance that will make me the happiest?  I know that just being a mom right now doesn’t completely fulfill me.  I also know that if I didn’t have children and a husband, I wouldn’t be completely fulfilled.  What is the balance for me?

Pamala Oslie wants me to write down my feelings for my Blue, write my hopes and highest dreams and desires.  Right now I don’t have much to write about that.  I hope in the next few months my hopes and dreams will emerge.  But now I do know that I want to do good in the world somehow, and bring some kind of service to people.  I also know that I want to be wealthy enough to not have to worry about money so I don’t have to shop sales, thrift stores and yard sales all of the time; I can have my house the way I want it; I can hire someone to clean; go out to eat frequently or hire a cook or something (same as the housework issue.  I don’t like doing them and I’d rather be doing other things); I can travel as much as I want and the way that I want; I can go to plays, ballets, exhibits or other venues that cost money; I’d love to be able to pay Michelle (sister) to decorate my house for me, or pay other people to get the work done on my house and car; I can help others when they need it (I would love to hear about someone who has a need and just send them anonymous money, or items that they are in need of).   Chris and I don’t go on dates because it takes money.  Our marriage suffers because of lack of money and because of the mistakes we’ve made with it.  We have heard many times that we need to go on weekly dates, have an overnighter every three months, and go on a trip just the two of us for a week once a year.  Well, without money to do all of that, it makes doing those things impossible.  So I guess that’s another goal – to be able to take care of my marriage the way it needs to be.  Money takes up so much time and energy, and I want to be done with that and to use my energy for a higher good.  I want for there to just be an abundance of money at all times so that paying for anything is just a non-issue in my life.  I also want to be healthy and be free from pain (especially in my arm and knees, this will help me be able to dance like I want to do, but the pain is holding me back).  Adam will be in Kindergarten in the Fall, and so I need to figure out what it is that I want to fill my time with while my children are gone all day at school.  It might be different than when they grow up and leave, but I need to know what I should do (does Heavenly Father want me to do something specific, or is it totally up to me?) while my children are still at home.

I’ve also been thinking: God wants diversity, right?  I shouldn’t just stay at home, especially if there is more that I feel like I should be doing right now.  Isn’t it ok for people to travel around, helping others, doing good outside of their own little house?  There is so much to be done!  Not everyone is the same and wants the same things – that is what makes this world so great, there is so much diversity.  So, there are so many different types of people, and it takes all of us.  I need to have a good balance like my mom did.  So that is the challenge right now, figuring out my Blue AND my Violet.  And I need to remember that it’s fine for me to not have to be like everyone else!!!!  I am ME and it’s perfect for me to be who I am, not who others are or who others think I should be!!  I was just re-reading some of my emails, and this one came in December – it’s perfect for what I was just saying, and I think I really understand it now! 

“There is no one perfect way to be a good mother. Each situation is unique. Each mother has different challenges, different skills and abilities, and certainly different children. The choice is different and unique for each mother and each family. Many are able to be ‘full-time moms,’ at least during the most formative years of their children’s lives, and many others would like to be. Some may have to work part- or full-time; some may work at home; some may divide their lives into periods of home and family and work. What matters is that a mother loves her children deeply and, in keeping with the devotion she has for God and her husband, prioritizes them above all else.”  -M. Russell Ballard