I hope that by sharing my honest experiences as I heal, that others will find help and hope. Start at the About My Quest tab.

The Universe keeps bringing Agency to my attention the last few days, so I guess there is something I need to pay attention to and learn from!

Last night, Chris gave our family a lesson for our Family Home Evening on Agency and choices.  And on Sunday, one of the lessons that was taught in church was about Agency!  The teacher asked the attendees to give examples of how we have made a choice and then noticed the consequences of those choices (she only wanted good examples).  I immediately thought of a choice that I made with Nicholas being born, but I felt stupid sharing it in the class.  But I will share it here.  When I was 7 months along with my oldest child, I was 21 years old, we were told that he had a hole in his heart which would need open-heart surgery, plus he had a “coarctation” (a narrowing of an arch in his heart, which would need to be fixed a few days after his birth), and on top of that there is a 50% chance that he could have Down syndrome which will bring a whole slew of problems on its’ own.  Our world was shattered – or so we thought.  We decided to have an amniocentesis just to be sure so that we were prepared at his birth.  We met with the Geneticist and we were told that he does have Down syndrome and that abortion is an option if we choose it.  I have never believed in abortion, and although at the time I felt like my life was basically over and would be miserable from then on,  it was a very easy decision to keep him.  As I look back on the last 13-1/2 years since Nicholas’ birth, I am so amazed that even though it has been a hard road with him I have learned so much and wouldn’t trade him for anything!  He has brought things into my life that I never could have learned or experienced otherwise.  I know that Chris feels the same way.  So my point is that not all of our choices that we make in life are going to be easy or fun, but if they are right then the pay-offs will be well-worth it and amazing!

Today this was on Carol Tuttle’s Remembering Wholeness Facebook Group Page:  “In every moment, during every day of your life, you have choices. The choice to create more struggle or the choice to create more freedom and joy.” “Choose thoughts that support you in feeling good more and more each day.”

And to end, this story was forwarded to me through email this morning.  I love it…

John is the kind of guy you love to hate.   He is always in a good mood and always has something positive to say.  When someone would ask him how he was doing, he would reply, ‘If I were any better, I would be twins!’  He was a natural motivator.  If an employee was having a bad day, John was there telling the employee how to look on the positive side of the situation.  Seeing this style really made me curious, so one day I went up and asked him, ‘I don’t get it!  You can’t be a positive person all of the time.  How do you do it?’

He replied, ‘Each morning I wake up and say to myself, you have two choices today.  You can choose to be in a good mood or…you can choose to be in a bad mood.  I choose to be in a good mood.  Each time something bad happens, I can choose to be a victim or…I can choose to learn from it.  I choose to learn from it.  Every time someone comes to me complaining, I can choose to accept their complaining or…I can point out the positive side of life.  I choose the positive side of life.’

‘Yeah, right, it’s not that easy,’ I protested.

‘Yes, it is,’ he said.  ‘Life is all about choices.  When you cut away all the junk, every situation is a choice.  You choose how you react to situations.  You choose how people affect your mood.  You choose to be in a good mood or bad mood.  The bottom line:  It’s your choice how you live your life.’

I reflected on what he said.  Soon hereafter, I left the Tower Industry to start my own business..  We lost touch, but I often thought about him when I made a choice about life instead of reacting to it.

Several years later, I heard that he was involved in a serious accident, falling some 60 feet from a communications tower.  After 18 hours of surgery and weeks of intensive care, he was released from the hospital with rods placed in his back.  I saw him about six months after the accident.  When I asked him how he was, he replied, ‘If I were any better, I’d be twins…Wanna see my scars?’  I declined to see his wounds, but I did ask him what had gone through his mind as the accident took place.  ‘The first thing that went through my mind was the well-being of my soon-to-be born daughter,’ he replied.  ‘Then, as I lay on the ground, I remembered that I had two choices:  I could choose to live or…I could choose to die.  I chose to live.’

‘Weren’t you scared?  Did you lose consciousness?’  I asked..

He continued, ‘….the paramedics were great.  They kept telling me I was going to be fine.  But when they wheeled me into the ER and I saw the expressions on the faces of the doctors and nurses, I got really scared.  In their eyes, I read ‘he’s a dead man’.  I knew I needed to take action.’

‘What did you do?’ I asked.

‘Well, there was a big burly nurse shouting questions at me,’ said John.  ‘She asked if I was allergic to anything ‘Yes, I replied.’  The doctors and nurses stopped working as they waited for my reply.  I took a deep breath and yelled, ‘Gravity’  Over their laughter, I told them, ‘I am choosing to live.  Operate on me as if I am alive, not dead.’”

He lived, thanks to the skill of his doctors, but also because of his amazing attitude….I learned from him that every day we have the choice to live fully.  Attitude, after all, is everything.  Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself.  Each day has enough trouble of its own.’

After all today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.

I am feeling really good this morning (part of it may be that I got to sleep-in?!). I woke up and while still laying there I looked at my Vision Wall and pondered about all of it for probably 10 minutes. So I got out of bed already feeling happy, positive, grateful and loving.

For as long as I can remember, my body has healed extremely slowly. Just a couple of examples: I remember as a teenager having a sprained ankle literally for years because it wouldn’t heal quickly and then since it was weak I would sprain it again. And in the summer of 2007 I strained my shoulder sawing a limb off a tree. It still hasn’t healed. I didn’t go to a doctor for it. With all of the “luck” I have had in my life with doctors actually doing anything to heal me I thought, “why bother?” So I’ve had a hurt shoulder for over a year and a half, and it’s caused other problems with my arm, hand and thumb. Anyway, I just tapped on how my body doesn’t heal quickly and the way that God intended it to. And then I tapped on the positive things like, “I allow my body to heal rapidly and the way that God intended it to.” And anything else that I could think of.

This whole quest that I am on is completely a lifestyle change. Whenever I used to hear of something that I wanted to try for healing, I would try it for awhile, or just think of it a couple of times a day or whatever, but I wouldn’t really immerse myself in it. And I would just think, “ok, I’ve tapped on that issue, now I’ll be happy!” or “I completely agree with that idea, so now that I’ve learned it I’ll be happy!” But I didn’t remember the things that I had learned and wasn’t changing my constant negative thinking and feeling patterns. Now that I am doing things the way that I am, it is just so obvious that I was doing things the wrong way before. At least for me, I have to completely surround myself through my entire day with all of this new way of thinking (i.e. Vision Board, Mind Movie, listening to cd’s while I’m in the car or exercising or working around the house, reading and studying these new positive methods and the Law of Attraction and scriptures, writing down Affirmations, looking at all of this stuff even while brushing my teeth) I know that it is paying off. I used to constantly think negative thoughts, but now I find that those negative thoughts just aren’t there. And if they do come, I’m strengthened enough that I can change that thought to a positive one and remember the things that I am learning about. I just love this so much!! I know that I will never be the same as I used to be. Thank heaven.

I went for a walk today. Luckily my knees and everything were well enough! My feet have been bothering me lately, and I really think it’s because I am wearing the same shoes that I’ve had for probably 15 years. Not that I’ve worn them every day, because only a short amount of that time have I actually worn them. But I know they’re worn out. Anyway, I haven’t bought new ones because of lack of money. But, now that I’m getting well, I am going to buy some new ones on Monday because I need them, and because I am getting over my lack of money issues, and money is now finding its’ way to me.

I am listening again to Carol Tuttle’s Affirmations to Change Your Life Now cd, again. I really like most of her stuff, it is so helpful! I don’t say the, ”Thank you God” affirmations, I just think we shouldn’t use His name that often out loud. I am also not quite sure about the whole petitioning your angels idea that she has. I believe that we are to ask God for help, and then if He chooses to help and he needs angels to help us, then He will ask them. But those are the only two things so far that I haven’t agreed with her about.

Tonight Chris and I went to the adult session of Stake Conference (a church meeting twice a year where members of my church in a larger area meet together for spiritual talks and music). Before January, I really tried to go to all church meetings, and I usually was glad that I went. But now, I don’t just try to go, I WANT to go. I have found that every meeting that I go to, I love being there.  I feel very enlightened while I’m there and really just have a wonderful feeling while I’m there and always learn something and feel edified.  In the meeting, it was talked about a little about writing in a journal for posterity to read about your life.

I’m sorry, but I feel like I need to write all of this down. Warning, it’s very negative. I woke up this morning trying to be happy and positive. I did my energy exercises while the kids got ready for school, but no positive feelings would come and I want to cry. I took the carpool very grumpily. As soon as the kids got out of the car I turned on The Secret and did some tapping. With how I was feeling, I didn’t care if anyone saw me. When I got home, I told Adam (5) that I needed a “time out” in my room for a while and took myself straight there. I started bawling. I immediately got on my knees and bawled to Heavenly Father, begging him for help. I feel such sadness, negativity and despair. Has all of my work for the last 5 weeks been for nothing? Am I just undoing all of that hard work right now? I need something great today to let me know that I’ve been on the right track and good things are coming to me. I need someone to support me. I need a mentor or someone to be here for me whenever I need it. I feel like I have no one. I don’t have a best friend. No one understands what I’m going through. My husband has no clue and is not here for me. I feel like he’s fighting against me. Where are all of these feelings coming from? Are they the 20+ years of negativity and despair that are surfacing and I need to tap them out? I got up from my prayer and immediately sat on my bed and tapped like crazy. At first I just tapped on my feelings of despair and sadness while I sobbed. I just kept tapping, and then whenever something came into my mind I’d include that. I didn’t even say anything, I just thought them. After about ten minutes of that, the despair and sadness went away. I wasn’t totally happy, but I needed to get out to Adam and get some of these things written down before I forgot them.

Some video clips just came in my email box from Bob Doyle in the free area of his website. He addresses more about the Law of Attraction that The Secret doesn’t really get in to, and also talks about the media, God or the Creator of the universe and all of these laws and how the Law of Attraction actually is crediting that Creator. That was huge for me to see and answered a lot of my questions!

I just tried to go on a walk. Less than a minute into it, my foot hurt, my knee was straining, and a muscle at the top of my leg hurt. All three of these were in the same leg. So I had to come home. I went straight to Louise Hay’s book You Can Heal Your Life to look at what she says are the mental causes of them. It was very funny what I found. I know that they were true! So I tapped on those.

I’ve still been feeling a little low today. I made sure I played with my boys a lot, which helped them and me. At about 9pm, I reviewed a little of the main things that I have been learning about: LOVE is huge (I looked up in the Topical Guide of my Bible and there are TONS of scriptures about love!), for yourself and everyone. I’m reminded of a children’s song that I grew up with: “Jesus said love everyone, treat them kindly too. When your heart is filled with love, others will love you.” Wow! That’s the Law of Attraction right there! I also love in John 3:16, “God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son.” That’s amazing to me that he gave us Christ and the atonement and all that Jesus did for us because he LOVES us.

Gratitude is another huge one. I wrote down many things in my Gratitude notebook that I am thankful for today.

Carol Tuttle talks a lot about how we are conditioned to believe that it is HAVE, DO, BE, but we really are supposed to live our lives as BE, DO, HAVE.  You need to Be first then Do (inspired action, not just working hard for something) and then you will Have. Other masters of the Law of Attraction have also talked about this. We need to be giving, as much as we can. And, we need to have our energy vibrating at a higher level (Love and Gratitude is the highest – I think that’s what I heard). After thinking about these things, it brought a lot of peace to me and I feel so much better!

This morning started out well – two hours ago. It’s 9:00 and I’m feeling like it’s going to be a positive day!

I forced myself to go on a walk this morning, I just had to not think about it too much. The whole time I tried to smile, and to keep positive thoughts. I don’t have any headphones yet so I couldn’t listen to Carol Tuttle’s Affirmations cd, so I had to just think of my own affirmations, visualizations, and just positive thoughts. I told myself, “I love to exercise! Isn’t this great that I get to exercise and feel great!” I also thought, “It is familiar to me to be happy. It is familiar to me to think positive thoughts,” and so forth.

I just did lots of EFT tapping on some issues that I’ve thought of with maybe why my knees aren’t being healed. I feel so positive and happy now!

I listened to some of Carol Tuttle’s Affirmations cd during lunch. I think I’m going to record my voice saying affirmations that I need to hear and then play it in my sleep, listen to it on walks, play it during the day, etc. I’m excited to see how much quicker my progress is after I do this.

My mother-in-law knows of the quest that I am on right now and sent this link to me: The Dreams Movie. I loved this so much!!!!!!!!! From the beautiful music, to the incredible picture (I LOVE landscape photographs!!!), to the inspiring messages. I will look at this often. It is so exciting and gives me peace to be able to see some of my dreams coming to life in my mind. I’ve only had this one other time in my life, and that was just for a few months when I was in art school to become a Landscape Photographer, right before I met Chris. And that wasn’t even as vivid and visual as what I can see now!!! It’s amazing that one month ago, I was in such despair, and now I have such hope and vivid dreams that I can see in my mind coming to pass! It’s hard for me to describe this feeling, but it’s just absolutely joyful!!

I’ve played with Adam a lot today, and he’s only gotten upset once. He took himself to his room, and then came out on his own a few minutes later completely fine.

I’ve been wondering this for a few weeks, and am now searching for an answer.  Some things that I’ve learned about just don’t seem right, or I don’t get a good feeling from a certain person.  I’ve gotten a weird feeling from the start about Eckhart Tolle, but I didn’t trust my instincts.  I thought that some of the things sounded true, so the rest of his stuff must be true.  But, it has just not felt quite right the whole time.  I immediately thought of “the philosophies of men” and I looked in the scriptures (as I have been doing a lot lately) about philosophy.  Colossians 2:8 says, “Beware lest any man spoil you through philosophy and vain deceit after the tradition of men, after the rudiments of the world, and not after Christ.”  I prayed about Eckhart Tolle and felt the answer that I need to not pursue him and his teachings.  If there are truths that he teaches, I can learn about them from a different source.  I feel that some of the things that he teaches are truths, but a lot is going against the gospel of Jesus Christ.  A lot of it is Buddhism.  That isn’t to say that there isn’t truth in all things, I firmly believe that there is.  But truth can also be mingled with un-truth.  So instead of blindly accepting anything that anyone says (or writes), I need to find out for myself first if it is correct for me to learn about.

I was just watching a seminar with a group of students from Harvard that are all different religions. The Buddhist girl explained some about her religion and it’s what Eckhard Tolle teaches in The Power of Now. They believe there is no eternal soul, no eternal anything, and all you have is right now and that is all that matters. That is so unlike what I believe as a Christian. Also, (from my understanding) Buddhists believe that they are completely 100% in charge of their life and what they make of their life. It reminded me of The Secret, and how it bugged me years ago (one of the reasons I quit thinking about The Law of Attraction), and it bugs me now. I am so interested in finding the balance between the Law of Attraction and God and submitting our will to His. All of the research that I’ve done so far has said that we are completely in control of our lives and we can manifest anything we want. I completely agree that we CAN do that. But, that isn’t necessarily what is best for us. I’d like to look more into how these two merge together.

Another harder morning. Definitely not as hard as my “old self”, but not that easy, either. I took offense at something too which is making it even harder for me to be positive and happy. I said some forgivenesses which helped a little, now I need to focus on getting myself happy for a few minutes.

I said my prayers and I felt better, then I did my energy exercises (from The Promise of Energy Psychology by David Feinstein, Donna Eden, and Gary Craig) while breathing fairly deeply and looking at my Vision Board Wall (I do the homolateral exercises since my energies are switched still. I know they’re switched because I have someone push on my arm while I put my other hand on my head. But I can’t remember now how exactly to tell, and I can’t remember which book it says it in.)

In the mail the other day was a March of Dimes and a Leukemia Lymphoma donation envelope. I never pay to those since I’ve always been in debt and didn’t feel like I could give to those causes, plus I give a 10% tithing to my church already. But I’ve been reading about giving. When we don’t give because we think we don’t have enough money then we’re putting ourselves in the “lack” mode and that we need to help others and give money, even more so than we would normally. So, I did. Instead of throwing the envelopes away, I put $2 in each and sent them off and had feelings of gratitude that we do have money and I can help others. It felt really good! I know $2 isn’t much, but for me it is and I think that’s what matters.

Knowing now what my children’s aura colors (and thus their real personalities) are is helping me to understand them better and be more accepting of them. Pamala Oslie is so awesome!

While I worked on my website, I listened to Carol Tuttle’s “Affirmations to Change Your Life Now”. She says that “I am” are the two most powerful words which to create. She explains when Christ says, “I am that I am” it means He is the Creator. Interesting, I had always wondered what that meant!!

It’s so interesting to me (and a little frustrating, but I’m trying to be positive) that sometimes certain methods of healing will work for me, and other times they don’t. For instance, some days looking at my Vision Board and Mind Movie will really give me a happiness and joyful feeling, but today, I’m having to go deeper than that. Just those simple things aren’t really working for me. I just lay on the bed and meditated for a few minutes and breathed deeply (breathing always helps) and I thought of doing some EFT. I have NO idea why I’m kindof down and grumpy today, so I just tapped on, “I’m feeing down and negative for some reason today”. After doing that for a few minutes, I definitely feel better. Still not what I’ve felt before, but better. So I need to not be discouraged that what I usually do doesn’t work, I just need to keep doing the many things that I’m learning about and I’ll get there.

This just came in an email to me today: “’For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. Be not thou therefore ashamed of the testimony of our Lord.’ (2 Timothy 1:7–8.)” God does not want us to fear, and He has given us power and a sound mind and love. So the negative stuff obviously comes from the adversary because it doesn’t come from God!

I’ve been thinking about my knees and it keeps popping into my mind about what it says in James 2:17 “Faith, if it hath not works, is dead.” I take that to mean that we can’t just have faith and do nothing to help things along. We can’t expect Heavenly Father to do EVERYTHING for us. For instance, we’re told that we need to exercise to be healthy. Well, if I don’t like exercising, does God accept that and say, “Ok, since you don’t like to do it, I’ll just strengthen your body for you.” Nope. He doesn’t work that way. So, since I’ve prayed for healing, maybe Heavenly Father expects me to do “works” as well. I did EFT, but I think maybe He wants me to strengthen my knees on my own. Especially since I haven’t had regular exercise in probably 10 years, my knees are weak. So I need to do my part to strengthen them. Yuck. But I want healing, so I’ll do the dreaded walking every day and specific knee-strengthening exercises so that I can eventually dance and do other fun exercising. I’ve done knee strengthening exercises in the past, and while it definitely strengthened my leg muscles, it didn’t help my knee problems. But, now that I am focusing on using The Law of Attraction in a positive way, maybe this time it will work!

This was very timely, but an email just came from The Science of Getting Rich about Actions. It talked about how we shouldn’t just work hard for something, but think about what you want first, and really believe you can have it, then act (and it should be Inspired Action, like it says in The Secret)

Ok, I just went on a walk. I almost didn’t go, but I just stopped thinking about it and got ready and out the door. I said affirmations to myself the whole way (only about 15 minutes, but it’s a start!) and really tried to breathe deeply and lots. Now that I’m home, I still feel like I want to focus on breathing and do it deeply. It feels really good. I still want to research more into it, but I looked up breathe and Breath of Life in the scriptures, and I found in Genesis 2:7 “And the Lord God…breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living soul.” I find that very interesting. By God’s breath, man came alive? Yes, breathing sustains our life and if we go for more than a few minutes without it we die, but why? Why can we go without food and water for days longer, but not without air? Then in Genesis 7:22 it’s talking about during the flood of Noah, and how when the flood came everything died, “All in whose nostrils was the breath of life, of all that was in the dry land, died.” I want to research this more later.

Adam is in his room screaming at me. He’s been sad, angry, non-compliant, argumentative, and not listening all week. If I am getting better, why is he getting worse? It’s been nice, though, that I haven’t been mean back to him. I’ve stayed calm, most of the time. I did raise my voice once to him, but I am trying to be proud of myself that I did so well! And I FEEL better about myself when I do positive things, which makes me in a better mood!

Wow this has been a roller coaster of a day with my moods. I can’t seem to stay positive. This evening was very rotten, I got mad at Adam and was just totally frustrated with him and the other boys. I always feel so bad when the boys go to bed with me mad. After they got in bed, I’ve been sitting here in the quiet, reading my scriptures, then doing some EFT on Adam and me. I think I know what his problem is this week, that I’ve hardly paid any attention to him, other than telling him “no” or just micro-managing things he should be doing. I’m sure that he hasn’t been listening to me, yelling at me, saying I’m being mean, etc. because he’s starving for my attention, poor little boy. Tomorrow I will do better. Hopefully that is the answer. In the meantime, I’m trying to forgive myself and be positive. I need to go to bed early.

It has been a nice morning so far – I’ve really tried to stay smiling and positive and speaking kindly while getting the boys ready for school. It’s nice to start the day off well!

I had a ½ hour phone session with Pamala Oslie this morning – she is so incredible! What a kind and helpful person she is, and what a gift she has! She is definitely one of my heroes. The things she told me completely coincided with the things that my Patriarchal Blessing (in my church, these are blessings told to us about our life to give us more direction) tells me. Now after the session, I feel so awesome! I am SO excited to live and to see what comes about in my life! (That is completely the opposite feeling than what I’ve had for most of my life. What a difference!) And now that she told me my family’s Life Colors, I can easier help my children be who they are.

I just had a great conversation with my son Matthew (10). His brother Adam (5) has been SO excited all day for him to come home and see his Lego Starwars game that he’s been playing. Matthew got home, and realized that somehow Adam had wiped out Matthew’s game which was hard for him to get to the higher levels. Both my boys came upstairs bawling – Matthew because his game was wiped out, Adam because Matthew was mad at him. So I explained to Matthew some of the things that I’ve been learning about. We can’t change the past. We can only learn from mistakes. It was an accident that Adam wiped his game out, and there’s nothing we can do now to change it. We can choose to be upset about the past and hurt people because we’re hurting, or choose to let it roll off us and move on and be happy. I told him to breathe deeply and focus on right now. I said that it is completely up to us what we make of this life. Do we make things hard, or easy? We don’t have to make them hard – that is up to us. If something SEEMS hard, are we going to let it BE hard, or make it BE easy? It’s up to us to choose and act accordingly. He understood the things I said to him, and felt like they were true. It’s so great that I can pass this knowledge that I am gaining onto my children, and help their lives to be better! I wish I had learned these lessons many years ago. But I know it now, and I’m not turning back. Life is SO much nicer already! I know it going to be so awesome when I’ve let these new truths stick!

Carol Tuttle in Remembering Wholeness said that when she was trying to change:

“I would walk around the house repeating between fifty to one hundred times a day, ‘I am happy, life is easy, and it is familiar.’ I would notice and catch myself making life harder than it had to be and say to myself, Some part of me is still believing I am a victim and that life has to be hard. Then I would ask myself, What do I want? I want to feel good, I want to be happy, and I want others to feel good just being around me. Then I would translate that into self-affirmations and say to myself, I am feeling good. I am happy. I am experiencing others feeling good just from being in my presence. Whatever you are currently dealing with, know that it no longer has to be hard or take a long time to change. Your intention to feel good right now will be honored, and your life will start to change. Keep coming back to that and think good thoughts as many times as you need to. It will become your reality.”

I love this. I am going to print it out and add it to the things I look at every day.

I picked Matthew up (and hugged him) as he wrapped his legs around me and he said, “Your legs are getting stronger!” I wasn’t sure what he meant. So he said, “You didn’t used to be able to pick me up without it hurting your legs.” I was excited! But then I walked up the stairs a few minutes later and I strained my knee. I need to be healed to be able to exercise, dance, have fun, etc. But how? What do I need to do to be healed? I just looked up “healing” in the scriptures, and found about the man who wanted to be healed but didn’t believe, so he prayed for faith (“heal thou my unbelief”) and then he was healed. So, is it as easy as just having the faith that Heavenly Father, through Christ, can heal me? If so, I must not have enough faith. I even prayed for it, and I guess I still don’t have it. I don’t understand.

This morning is Saturday, so I got to sleep in a little! I lay in bed for a while being grateful, and thinking of being positive, smiling, etc. Oops, I forgot to pray. I’ll go do that now.

I am finding that it is hard to be around others while I am in this process. It would be nice if I could just hide myself away for a few months until I get healed. It’s challenging for me to stay positive, when the people around me are negative and grumpy.

I’m now listening to another cd by Carol Tuttle, and a few things that she talked about are: notice where you create the most struggle, what’s the most out of balance in your life health, relationships, money; and notice what are your most common expressions and phrases are that you say about those. Use EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) or RET (Rapid Eye Technology). Tap in the middle of your chest while you repeat positive statements about the issue you want changed. Change your money issues so you can now have the money for the things you want. She says, “Affirmations ‘I am’ are two of the most powerful words in our vocabulary.” Draw a circle on the ground, and speak affirmations into the circle. Then step in the circle and massage yourself with the energy you’ve just created. Sing and dance affirmations. She and her husband go on a “creation run”. They pick a topic and focus on that for a few minutes saying “I am” statements about that topic.

I had bought some EFT dvd’s a few years ago that explain the process and how to do it.  I actually haven’t finished watching them, although what I watched was very good in helping me learn about it.  But I just found on Bob Doyle’s website that he and Carol Look have dvd’s on EFT as well, but they also incorporate the Law of Attraction.  I think those videos would be more helpful to me, since I’m learning more about the LofA.  (Here is the link for them if you’re interested in looking into them The Law of Attraction and EFT.) I’ll try and explain:  EFT is a tool for getting rid of emotional ties to negative issues, by tapping on certain points (like Acupressure or Acupuncture) on your body while you think and have the feelings about that certain issue. These points (for instance to the side of your eyes, and above your chin) on your body are some of the places where energies are stored, and tapping on them with your fingertips releases that energy that makes you feel upset about something.  It sounds strange, I know, but it truly does work to get over negative thoughts and feelings, it’s been amazing!

During dinner I was just really bugged, and I don’t know why. I excused myself right after dinner so that I wouldn’t get upset at anybody (well, at least that’s positive!) and I went into my room. I tried figuring out what was wrong, and I just started bawling! It was very strange. I don’t understand what is going on. Is this normal to go through?

Over the last few weeks I’ve subscribed to so many “self-help” websites’ email newsletters. I receive inspirational quotes, thoughts, information, videos, etc. almost daily. I love these emails!